Essential characteristics of an effective parent
Mistakes are a normal part of parenting, and learning from them is crucial, according to parenting expert Ruth Abraham. Good relationships don't come from not making mistakes, but from learning to repair and being ready to develop, she suggests.
Abraham, a sociologist, emphasizes that a quality emotional parent-child relationship is essential for healthy child development. This relationship establishes a secure attachment, which underpins socioemotional and cognitive growth. The secure emotional bond provides children with a sense of safety and responsiveness that contributes to better mental health outcomes and the development of strong interpersonal skills over time.
Abraham's perspective aligns with broader attachment theory frameworks. Sensitive and responsive caregiving, she explains, shapes a child's ability to form trusting relationships and manage stress, which are foundational for overall well-being and psychological resilience.
When it comes to child-rearing, Abraham finds the idea that the parent has the right to shape the child problematic. She attributes the difficulty in being a good parent to outdated parenting views, such as phrases like "What Hanschen doesn't learn, Hans will never learn" or "The child must learn this now."
Many parents struggle with societal expectations to be perfect, often doing far more than is humanly possible. However, Abraham stresses that the quality of the relationship between parent and child, rather than the right method, is what counts.
Children understand social differences very early on, and they develop their social competence and resilience mainly when they feel accepted and understood, not when they are "educated" according to certain rules. Abraham recommends an open approach with the child, and with oneself, and for not exploiting the power dynamic but being aware of it.
In practical terms, Abraham suggests addressing problems in the here and now with the child and thinking about solutions. A radical change in behavior is unrealistic, but small steps can be taken to improve, such as putting a pillow in front of oneself to shout into.
Most people do not wish for their parents to be perfect and make no mistakes, but rather for them to apologize when they are wrong. Abraham advocates for this approach, as it fosters a healthy, open, and honest relationship between parent and child.
In conclusion, the quality of the parent-child relationship, not the perfect parenting method, is what truly matters for healthy child development. Embracing this idea and learning from mistakes can lead to a stronger, more resilient, and empathetic generation of children.
- Ruth Abraham, a proponent of attachment theory, encourages vocational training within community policy to help parents develop sensitivity and responsiveness, essential for building strong, healthy child-parent relationships.
- As part of educational-and-self-development, Abraham advises parents to seek vocational training that can help them understand family-dynamics and foster personal-growth, all contributing to a positive health-and-wellness lifestyle.
- In her extensive research on relationships, Abraham highlights the importance of lifestyle choices, including parenting, that promote open dialogues and a mutual understanding between parents and children, supporting the overall well-being of the community.
- In the realm of science and sociology, Abraham's emphasis on empathetic relationship-building through vocational training has significant implications for our understanding of mainstream child development, including the cognitive, socioemotional, and interpersonal aspects that influence individual life trajectories.
